


under scrutiny

by aurcras



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Erza is oblivious, Erza is on a mission, F/M, Gray doesnt want to let her know, this is so long but long time no see
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:15:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24823687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aurcras/pseuds/aurcras
Summary: erza is a woman on a mission, and she needs some answers.
Relationships: Gray Fullbuster/Erza Scarlet
Comments: 5
Kudos: 38





	under scrutiny

**Author's Note:**

> this is extremely long, but hey! long time no see. i've been getting back into grayza again, and the nostalgia just hit me all at once so i had to pump something out as soon as i could. i found an old wip and i decided to rework it, but it became too long for its own good. i tend to go overboard with the word count sometimes, but i hope you'll enjoy this anyway! and i do hope i managed to get erza's characterisation properly; it's been a long while since i've written her, so fingers crossed. p.s. ultear is also still young here.

Erza considers herself to be a pretty observant person, even when she’s not on the battlefield fighting foes. Whether it be a slight ingredient change to her favourite strawberry cheesecake, or the way Mira had gotten a bit of a wardrobe change, the moment something alters in any way, she’s certain she’d be the first, or one of the first, to notice. This includes the relatively subtle, but still evident, evolution in many of the relationships between her guildmates.

Alzack and Bisca? As obvious as night and day, with Asuka as unquestionable proof of their love. Elfman and Evergreen are no better. Even if they had been lying to Mira about their marriage, she can undoubtedly still see the way their relationship started progressing to more than friends. Even Gajeel and Levy are getting a bit more obvious by the day; no one else questions their frequent appearances together anymore. The matter with Gray and Juvia still seems to be unresolved however. She had heard from the ice mage himself that he had tried to state his clear feelings for the girl as nothing more than platonic, but apparently she hadn’t listened to him. 

It had been unfortunate to hear, but now that she really thinks about it, perhaps she had overlooked something. Gray rejecting Juvia was no unusual occurrence, but she had been convinced that perhaps the water mage had been growing on him. Except it didn’t seem to be in the way everyone had expected.

In fact, as her honey brown eyes flicker from the male sitting beside her, to the pair across the hall, something else had occurred underneath everyone’s noses. She gazes a little longer at the blonde now scolding Natsu for whatever new shenanigan he had caught himself up in, her eyes narrowing. Erza taps her chin thoughtfully, glancing back at the now shirtless mage sitting beside her. _Interesting._

She turns her attention to Gray fully, watching as he lifts the glass of beer to his lips. “You like her, don’t you?”

Her question is apparently so shocking that he almost drops the glass, Gray swallowing down the beer in one huge gulp. She watches in concern as he chokes, slamming the glass down onto the counter before he beats his unclothed chest. Erza reaches out, ready to get up and assist him, but he raises a hand to stop her. He coughs roughly, wincing, and lifts his head to meet her worried gaze.

“What? Like who?” He manages to croak out, rubbing his sore throat. 

She motions to the pair standing in front of the job request board, waiting for his gaze to follow her. Erza points to the blonde scowling at Natsu in particular, before glancing back at him. 

“Lucy.”

Gray’s brows rise so high so quickly, she’s almost afraid they’ll fly off. He looks at her with a widened pair of eyes, almost as if she’s going crazy. Erza scans his reaction carefully, noting the scowl that’s now directed at her. Well that isn’t what she expected. Normally he tended to sport a blush whenever it came to topics like these, but why did he look so… irritated?

“What? No, that’s ridiculous,” he blurts out, shaking his head vehemently. “She’s my friend, maybe a little like a little sister to me too, ya’know? Like how you see Natsu as your annoying little brother, though why anyone would want that idiot as a brother is beyond me,” he mutters out the last part, and Erza shakes her head knowingly, restraining herself from scolding him.

Still, she finds herself agreeing with his analogy, somewhat. While it’s true that she has always seen Natsu as her little brother, she can’t help but think it different between Gray and Lucy. Though Lucy did scold Gray sometimes, like she did with Natsu. So maybe Mira is rubbing off on her more than she thought. It doesn’t matter though, not when she’s still unconvinced. 

“Oh?”

Gray huffs a little, turning his head away from her. She knows him well enough to picture the small pout he’s sporting, and can’t help but grin. How cute. “Why do you sound so surprised? Lucy’s great and all, but I’ve never liked her that way. Plus, I would never steal my best friend’s girl.”

Her eyes twinkle at that last sliver of information just as he runs a hand through his hair. “So Natsu’s your best friend now, huh?”

It’s unsurprising that they are, no matter how much they butted heads. Even though they seemed more like a pair with astounding amounts of sibling rivalry, she had known them both for so long to see that they cared about each other quite deeply. It just took a fair amount of effort trying to squeeze that admission from them. 

Gray looks away, the tips of his ears glowing a bright red. Bingo. 

“Shut up, Erza. We’re going off topic here.”

Erza grins widely at him, revelling in his flustered state. It isn’t everyday that she gets him to admit something like this; she has to enjoy it while it lasts. “I’m only teasing. But honestly, I really don’t believe you. I’ve seen the way you two flirt.”

She resists the urge to grimace at the observation, shocking herself by her own reaction.But she shakes her head almost immediately, stomping down on that thought quickly.

Though when she catches the red tinging in his cheeks, she finds herself pausing in her efforts to keep the strange thoughts at bay. “That’s all it was, flirting. We both know it’s all in good fun, and it gets that dense idiot jealous, so it’s a win-win situation. Besides, we don’t do it much anymore. We’ve been busy talking about… _other_ things.”

Her ears perk up at the new information, intrigued by its new course.

“What other things?”

Gray coughs, shaking his head. “Other things,” he repeats firmly, his tone stamping in the finality of his words. 

She gives him a once over, a slight challenge in her eyes but the man is stubborn. Reflecting back into her challenging gaze is one equally as defiant from the ice mage, a spark in his eyes as though tempting her to fight him on this. Erza decides to humour him. 

“Okay fine, you say you don’t like Lucy—“

“But I don’t. Not in that way.”

“—then who is it that you _do_ like?” Her eyes narrow, eyeing him like a hawk, “In _that_ way.”

“I don’t like anyone,” he retorts far too quickly for her liking. Gray is refusing to share eye contact with her, but that only makes her more determined to get some answers out of him. 

Erza crosses her arms. “I don’t believe you,” she states bluntly. “You clearly like someone. I’ve known you long enough to know when you’re lying.”

Gray goes silent for a moment before he releases a sigh. He turns to face her fully, a clear look of exasperation on his face. “If I say yes, will you drop it?”

“Aha! So you do like someone,” her eyes twinkle in triumph, lips curving into a smile that only mirrors her clear victory. But her grin falters only for the slightest of moments, the mage pointedly ignoring that little pang that strikes through her yet again. 

“Erza,” he says in a deadpan manner, but she doesn’t look at him. Instead, she searches around the room, trying to place the pieces together. 

“Let’s see, if it’s not Lucy, and it’s definitely not Juvia—“

She looks at him to gauge his reaction, and he only grimaces at the name. Gray shakes his head, running a hand through his hair. “Definitely not Juvia.”

The redhead nods, deciding not to question him further. She shifts her gaze back around the hall again, tapping her chin thoughtfully. Who could it possibly be?

“Then is it someone from the guild?” It’s got to be. Despite how much he’s hung around Loke, he doesn’t seem to be the type of guy to flirt with everyone he sees. She knows he can flirt, she’s seen it with Lucy firsthand, but that makes her frown again. Still, she doesn’t think he’d flirt with just anyone. 

Gray is an attractive man. Anyone with a working set of eyes could agree on that, so it’s no surprise to her that he’s quite popular with the ladies. But a serious relationship with someone? Has he ever dated anyone in the first place? She can’t recall him actively dating anyone before, but he doesn’t seem to be completely averse to the idea of dating. 

Perhaps this mysterious love of his has prevented him from wanting to seek out anyone else.

It’s actually very sweet of him, she thinks. If Gray has been saving himself for that one person, he must have loved them very much. Her cheeks heat up before she knows it; just the thought of it makes her want to squeal like a teenaged girl. Gray is so loyal, she gives him a once over, nodding thoughtfully. Any one would be lucky to have him. 

He raises a brow at her look but doesn’t comment on it. Rather, he seems intent on avoiding answering her question at all costs. Erza fixates a glare on him, and thankfully it has its intended effect when he finally heaves a sigh in surrender. “Okay, fine. She’s from the guild. Happy?”

She scrunches her nose, shaking her head. So it _is_ a she. “Of course she’s from our guild, I know that. There’s no girl outside the guild you’re close to, except maybe Ultear?”

At the shake of his head, she crosses that name out. She continues, “Ultear is out, but I saw that one coming. Now give me more clues that are actually useful.”

He grabs a fistful of his hair before releasing it, messing his raven locks roughly. “I already admitted that I liked someone, and even told you she’s from the guild. What more do you want from me, Erza?”  


She stares pointedly at him. “Gray.”

It’s just one word, but it has him surrendering in now time. “Fine, _fine!_ But after this, promise me you’ll drop it. I don’t want to talk anymore about it,” he pleads, and she nods, deciding to put him out of his misery. 

The ice mage sighs, pausing for a moment. She waits with a bated breath as he releases his own, “She’s closer to you than you think.”

Erza blinks. 

“I’m closer to her than I think? What do you mean?” 

Gray shakes his head, holding his two hands up to stop her. “Nope, that’s it from me. You promised me you’d drop it.”

She stares at him, and he stares back at her knowingly. Erza releases a sigh in frustration, shoulders slumping. 

“Fine,” she utters, with the slight petulance of a dissatisfied child. 

She did promise, so she'll drop it. That is, for _now_. 

* * *

“Closer to me than I think? What is _that_ supposed to mean? She mutters under her breath, staring absentmindedly at the strawberry cheesecake Mira had served up. It’s barely been eaten, the redhead twirling her fork on her plate and making no active move to cut another piece. 

The conversation from yesterday morning has been bugging her more than she’d realised. After she’d decided to drop it, Gray had decided to turn in early but not before getting into another fight with Natsu on the way. He’d told her that he was going out for a job the next morning, and reminded her not to stay back too late like she tended to do nowadays. Erza had merely waved him off, grateful for his concern as she wished him luck on the trip. 

It had been just over fifteen hours since she’d last spoken with the ice mage, but during those fifteen hours, she’d thought of nothing further than their conversation. She had been on autopilot the moment she returned home last night, taking a long bath as she mulled over the five poor excuses of clues he’d left her with. 

  1. For starters, the mage in question was female. And thanks to Gray’s unintentional admission, she could happily cross out half the guild already.
  2. The mage was from Fairy Tail, like she’d initially suspected. Gray’s closest female friend outside of the guild was Ultear, but he’d shut down that theory. 
  3. It wasn’t Juvia, nor Lucy, like she’d first thought. 
  4. On that note, it probably wasn’t Bisca as well. She was certain he didn’t like her that way, but if he did then she was sure to have a stern word with him to prevent him from potentially ruining the happiness of the Connell family. 
  5. Finally, apparently the girl was also close to _her_ specifically _._ While Erza had indeed wanted to specific clues, _this_ wasn’t what she’d meant. It did cut down more people, but that still left a little too many people as possibilities. 



Unfortunately, this was as much as she was going to get out of him, so she’d had to put some of her critical analysis and observation skills to work. It had meant more work for her, in the end keeping her up all night as she tried to narrow down the choices. 

But It was that final clue in particular that kept her running into a road block. Closer to her than she thought? Was he insinuating her physical closeness? Because she had drawn out a detailed floor plan of Fairy Hills herself, labelled whose room belonged to who, and tried a further process of elimination from there. But that couldn’t possibly have been it, could it? She was certain Cana was a potential candidate, seeing as those two had been longer friends than even she and Gray had, but Cana didn’t live in Fairy Hills. That left her scrapping that interpretation out of head, but she kept the floor plan just in case. 

If he meant close as in friendship wise, then there were a few people she would consider. Out of the remaining candidates, Mirajane was the closest female friend she had in the guild, but did Gray really see her that way? She remembered him calling her ‘Mira-chan’, something he didn’t do for anyone else, so perhaps that was a major indicator? 

But she needed a second opinion.

After having mulled over it for over half a day, spending the night tossing and turning in her bed, and desperately trying to distract herself the next morning with errands, she’d ventured off to the guildhall in hopes of finally clearing things up. Except she’d been so frazzled by her thoughts that when she’d entered the guild, her notorious intimidation seemed to have dissipated. 

Even the strawberry cheesecake Mira had placed in front of her had done nothing to alleviate the tension in her shoulders, still boggled by the riddle Gray had dumped onto her. It’s still driving her nuts. 

“Is there something bothering you, Erza? I just bought that cheesecake this morning. I’m sure it hasn’t gone off yet,” a sweet voice intones from in front of her, sharply cutting through her train of thoughts. 

Erza looks up at the source, years of training allowing her to remain calm in even the most surprising of situations (most of the time, that is). Her gaze meets the concerned eyes of Mirajane, the transformation mage now raising a brow. Ah, just one of the people she’d been thinking about. Perhaps someone, as attuned to matters like these, would be useful in discerning her thoughts, she concedes before shaking her head. 

“Not particularly, Mira,” the mage’s gaze is still fixated intently upon her, so she continues, “However I’d like to ask you about something.”

This catches her attention as Mira leans forward, raising a brow. “What is it, Erza?”

“Well,” she pauses, considering how to word it properly. Mira can be a little nosy sometimes, but she does give good advice. Erza decides to be straightforward with it. “Who would you consider as the closest friends I have here in the guild?”

Mira’s brows raise even higher in obvious intrigue. Erza can see the cogs turning in her mind, possibly wanting to interrogate her further on the suddenness of the question. “Everyone in Team Natsu,” she starts, Erza tilting her to the side before Mira elaborates, “You, Natsu, Happy, Lucy, Wendy, Carla, and Gray.”

She nods, intrigued by the name of their name (apparently Natsu’s the leader? She wonders how Gray will react to that, she thinks amusedly), but waits for her to continue. “Me, Bisca, Cana, Levy,” she finishes, scratching her head. 

“Did you need any more?”

Erza shakes her head, quite satisfied with the answer. “That’s fine, Mira. Thank you.”

Mira smiles brightly at her, “Don’t mention it, Erza. Is there anything else you need?”

She shakes her head again, flashing her a smile of her own. “That was all. Now, about the cake, I better get to enjoying it properly.” 

The redhead cuts into the strawberry cheesecake with much more vigour, popping the piece into her mouth happily. She ignores Mira’s slight look of disappointment, instead musing over the answer she had found for herself. 

Mira or Cana, she decides. It’s definitely one of them. Like Gray had said, the girl is closer to her than she thinks, and with Mira’s input, she can only think of one or the other. With Mira, it’s a no brainer. The girl is powerful, despite not always flaunting it. She’s also easily approachable, an esteemed model, and very easy to love. She can see why Gray would find her attractive, but that goes for Cana as well. 

Mira isn’t as close to Gray as Cana is, and Cana, despite her excessive drinking habits, is powerful and attractive as well. She also seems to be on the same wavelength with Gray, something even she doesn’t think she has with him.

She frowns at the thought. Her own friendship with Gray is definitely one built off long years of trust and mutual respect. He is great company, and easy to talk to. He also doesn’t seem to mind her peculiarities, though she’s firm in her belief that his excessive stripping habit is far more peculiar than any quirks she has of her own. But while she gets along with him, she doesn’t think it’s to the same level as he does with Cana. 

Perhaps that explains why it’s suddenly hard for her to breathe. 

* * *

The moment she sees him next, she drops everything she’s in the middle of doing and makes a beeline straight for him. It’s been three days since she’s last seen him (she didn’t think that his job would be so lengthy) but the thought has yet to leave her mind. It’s chewed her up just as bad as it’d done the first time, and she’s waited far too long to see him again for her not to get what she wants. 

She needs answers. 

Erza grabs his arm, pulling him away from his stroll down the streets of Magnolia and brings him to an empty alleyway nearby. She doesn’t take to reprimanding him of his current loss of shirt, instead staring intensely up at him as he gapes down at her, brows furrowed. 

“Erza? What’s this about?”  


“I know who you like.”

She watches his reactions intently. It morphs from its initial incomprehension quite quickly, shifting through an array of different expressions. To shock, worry, panic, and a faltering facade of calmness, she sees it all, but she’s not the least bit surprised.  Erza interrupts him just as he opens his mouth to speak.

“You like Cana.”

Gray gapes at her, his eyes close to bulging out of his eye sockets. She sees him loosen his hold on the bag strap on his arm before gripping it tightly again, eyeing her in disbelief. “Cana? How’d you come to _that_ conclusion?”

He sounds like he’s having an extremely difficult time trying to believe it, but not in the way that denotes her answer as being correct. If anything, he’s almost bewildered and disbelieved. Her eyes narrow at him, was it _that_ shocking? This isn’t what she expected at all, neither is her slight irritation for it. 

Erza crosses her arms. “You said it was someone _I_ was close to, and I narrowed it down to a few choices. I confided with Mira, and aside from Lucy and Wendy, she said I was closest to both her and Cana. Admittedly I am closer to Mira however, as you stated she was ‘closer than I think’, Cana was the more logical choice.”

Gray remains silent during her explanation, his features schooled into that practiced calmness she’s seen him parade countless times before. It’s a bit unnerving. 

When she’s finished, he lets out a quiet sigh, her shoulders tensing. “I see. Well in that case, you’re absolutely wrong."

“What?!”

She’s analysed every piece of interaction witnessed between the two, come up with counterarguments against it, and was now fully convinced with her answer. There had to be some kind of mistake. 

“I said you’re wrong, Erza. Will you drop this already?”  


Gray sighs again, scratching the back of his head with a scowl. She stares at him, frozen in place, as the cogs in her brain try to resume its functioning. 

“But who is it if it’s not Cana? Is it Mira then? I know she’s the closest to me, no matter our past. But I don’t believe I have overlooked it. I debated the answer and concluded Cana was the more logical choice for good reason, so how did it turn out to be M—“

“It’s not Mira,” he cuts off, “And it’s not Levy, or Lisanna, or Laki, or Evergreen, or Bisca, or Kinana. It’s definitely not Wendy either,” he scrunches his nose in disgust, shaking his head. 

“Now can we drop it?”

Erza is yet to say another word, having lost the ability to do more than gape and blink. He doesn’t bother to listen to her response, instead glancing over her before taking it as his cue to leave. 

She’s left dumbstruck in his wake, just managing to garner enough willpower to utter a single ‘ _What_?’ before it all comes crashing down.

* * *

Her feet move solely on muscle memory as she continues her stroll downtown. It had taken her a good ten minutes alone in the alleyway, trying to collect her thoughts before she willed herself through completing the errands she had initially been tasked to do. 

That had been about five hours ago, but she had yet to step foot into the guildhall. In fact, she had been continuously strolling throughout town, her thoughts never straying from her interaction with Gray earlier. 

“It’s not Lucy, or Juvia, or Ultear, or Cana, or Mira. It’s definitely not Wendy, or Bisca, or Levy, or Evergreen, Laki, and Kinana either. There are no more girls left in the guild, and if it isn’t any of them, then who could it possibly be?” She mutters under her breath, biting down on her lower lip harder.

“Was he lying to me? Was it not a girl after all? But Gray did say it was a she the first time we talked,” she continues, weaving past the curious onlookers as she kept her gaze fixated on the cobblestone. 

Erza frowns as a thought comes to her. “What if there had been no girl after all?” She abruptly halts in the middle of the sidewalk, frown deepening. 

“Had he just been trying to throw me off this whole time? Giving me answers he knew I wanted to hear so I’d leave him alone?” She slams her fist into her other palm, frown morphing into an angry scowl.

She marches forward with a huff at the thought, red flashing before her eyes. How could she have been so stupid? Gray had been trying to avoid the topic ever since she’d sprung it on him, and eventually gave in. He was good, she had to give him that, but that couldn’t have all been a lie, could it? Gray rarely lied, in fact, no one in Mira’s deemed ‘Team Natsu’ were much good at lying anyway, so she must have been sorely mistaken. 

But nothing seemed to click. No matter how many angles she looked at it, no matter how many times she’d recited all the names of the Fairy Tail members, she still drew a blank. So who could it possibly—  


“Erza?”

Her practiced training flies out the window when she jumps at the sudden call of her name, whipping around with a requipped sword at the source of the voice. She meets the terrified gaze of one Lucy Heartfilia, her brown eyes widened as she holds up two hands in surrender. 

Erza blinks, stowing away the weapon almost as immediately as it had come and lowers her head in apology. “My apologies Lucy, I didn’t mean to aim a weapon at you,” she holds out her arm toward the still frozen girl, “Please hit me for my penance.”

Lucy squeaks, shaking her head vehemently. “What? No no, there’s no need for that Erza. It’s okay, really. I was just surprised, that’s all.”

She lifts her head, meeting the kind smile of the celestial wizard. Erza bites her lip a little unsure, but at Lucy’s reassuring nod, she offers her a small smile of her own. “Again, I’m so sorry about that. But it’s nice to see you. What are you doing here?”

The blonde raises a brow, pointing at the building next to her. “I live here?”

She follows her outstretched finger, faced with the sight of an all too familiar apartment front and swallows thickly. Her face burns as brightly as her hair, clenching her fists at her sides at the realisation. _Had she been that distracted she hadn’t even noticed where it was she’d been walking to?_

“I must have been really out of it. I’m so sorry for disturbing you Lucy, I think it’s best if I head home now.”

Lucy shakes her head. “No, you weren’t any bother at all. But uh,” she hesitates for a moment, Erza waiting patiently. 

“Are you alright? I’ve noticed that you’ve been acting a bit strangely for the past couple of days? Is something on your mind?”

The concern laced in her voice warms the requip mage’s insides, taken a little off guard by the observation. _Had it gotten that bad?_ She wonders, frowning at the way a matter such as this had been responsible for her unusual behaviour. Logically, it shouldn’t matter to her who Gray liked, but it had consumed all her thoughts for the past few days or so that reprieve did not appear to be anywhere in sight. 

Erza bites her lip, hesitant to answer but Lucy seems to notice, holding up her two hands. “It’s fine if you don’t want to tell me. I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. We’re here for you, Erza,” she smiles brightly. 

“I— Thank you, Lucy,” she starts, reflecting a smile back at her. “It’s nothing much really, quite trivial in fact, but I’ve been preoccupied by a mystery of sorts lately that I can’t seem to stop thinking about it.”

Lucy taps her chin thoughtfully, “A mystery, you say? Trivial or not, I can understand why you’d want to solve it. Did you need any help in solving it?”

She shakes her head. “Unless you can read minds, I don’t think it’s possible to solve.”

“Impossible to solve?”

“It’s Gray,” Erza blurts out before she can stop herself, clamping a hand over her mouth only a few seconds later at the realisation. 

But it’s too late for Lucy had already heard, her eyes widening. “It’s Gray?”

“Along the lines,” she answers reluctantly, wondering if perhaps it would be time to let someone else in on her thoughts. Bottling her emotions in never did seem to work out for her, and she can just hear Mira in her head urging for her to speak up about some things to ease the load. _That’s what friends are for,_ she can hear her saying, so perhaps it wouldn’t hurt?

“I see. Well Gray is a pretty straightforward and honest guy. He has a tendency to keep things to himself, but I think if you ask him up front about it, he’ll give an answer. At least, most of the time he will,” Lucy comments, tapping her chin.

But Erza shakes her head in disagreement. “I’ve tried that, but he keeps trying to drop the subject.”

“He does? Did you want me to ask him about it then?”

The thought that he’d rather tell Lucy than her brings an unsettling feeling to her stomach. Erza holds back the urge to grimace as she keeps her features relatively unreadable, robotically shaking her head.

“It’s alright, Lucy. I can’t blame him for not wanting to say anything. Speaking about love can be quite embarrassing sometimes.”

“Love?” Lucy frowns. 

She nods, “Like who he’s in love with.”

“That’s easy. It’s y—“ 

Her hand clamps over her mouth the moment the words come tumbling out, Lucy’s eyes widened like a deer in headlights. Erza’s brows crease at the abrupt halt to her answer, Lucy just about ready for the ground to swallow her up. “It’s?”

She shakes her head vehemently, taking a few steps closer to her apartment. “It’s nothing, Erza! Forget I said anything! I um, I have to sleep now for an early job tomorrow! With uh, Natsu. Yeah, so I uh, goodnight Erza! Be safe on the way home!”

Erza can only watch in silent confusion as she almost trips over herself trying to head back into her apartment black, quickly racing away from view. “I— Okay then,” she mumbles quietly to herself, shaking her head. 

That was strange. It’s almost as if she knew… _Huh_.

* * *

Erza finds herself seated at the riverbank just after lunch, letting the sun’s rays sink into each of her pores as she gazes at the river in quiet tranquility. It’s been a while since she’s sat down here, but it brings up its own fair share of memories. 

Some of those quite sad, like the times she’d come to seek refuge at the riverbank just a few days after joining the guild to keep away from prying eyes. No one would be able to find her out there, and it was peaceful enough that the only accompaniment to her own stream of tears was the turquoise blue stream that wound its way across town. 

A smile makes its way onto her face as she thinks about it. While it had been the only place she could let the armour down and allowed herself to indulge in her tears, it evolved into something else entirely. Not all memories at the riverbank are sad though, in fact the most memorable of them involved a shirtless young boy racing from the top of the bank as he screamed out yet another of his daily challenges.

It was only when the young girl sitting alone turned her head that the brazen boy took a few stumbling steps back, his cheeks sporting a bright pink blush. That girl had quickly wiped away the tears from his sight, but it had been too late for her. The boy had already seen, and yet when she asked about his presence, expecting another duel to end in his defeat, he’d responded otherwise. He’d seen her with her guard down for the first time, and the whole time she could only expect him to use it against her. But he hadn’t, she thinks with a smile, that little boy had decided to understand her instead.

“Well you’re alone now, so why’re you cryin’?” 

It had caught her off guard, the way he saw past her walls yet accepted her all the same. He never did engage in another fight with her after that, but she hadn’t minded. He was the first one to show her what it truly meant to be in a guild like Fairy Tail, and if anything, she was grateful it had been him

It had been years since she met him, over a decade now, or even more, and they’d both grown in their ways. They’d both gotten stronger, fought off the demons of their past, and had more people to protect the larger their family grew. But they always had each other, and she can’t possibly imagine what it’d be like if he hadn’t reached out to her that day. If he hadn’t helped her integrate into what it truly meant to be part of a guild like Fairy Tail, she’s not sure what would’ve happened to her. 

She lifts her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms snugly around it as she rests her chin on her kneecaps. A small smile plays on her lips at the thoughts of the ice mage, the same person who’d been consuming a lot of her thoughts lately. 

She thinks back to what Lucy had mentioned the day before. It’d been easy to her apparently, to figure out who Gray had liked. Erza had been boiling with envy and disbelief when she’d gotten home last night, a bit disoriented that the girl had already come to a conclusion so easily without the need to consult with Gray about his few clues. 

It had been at the back of her mind all this morning too, but not as bad as the previous mornings. Though now that she’s alone with her thoughts, she lets herself indulge a little in it again. There’s something else about it that she’s too scared to contemplate about, and she doesn’t think she’s ready to fully unlock it yet, but it’s there.

The slight possibility that it could be _her_.

“I hope you’re not crying alone again. You’ve got us, remember?”

The low timbre of that voice has her ears perking, lifting her head from her knees as she sees the reason for her deep musings materialised in all his glory. He’s thankfully not shirtless yet or anything, but she’s certain he had a coat this morning. 

She shakes her head, a small smile playing on her lips as he walks down to sit beside her. “No, not crying. Just thinking.”

Gray glances over at her curiously, Erza turning back to gaze at the river. “Jewel for your thoughts?”

“Do you remember how we just sat here together, for the first time without us fighting? You still had that blush on your face after you caught me crying,” she muses, warmth coating her voice.

From the corner of her eye, she can see his ears turn a darker shade of red as he scratches the side of his face, possibly out of shyness. “It’s not my fault you were crying. I hate it when you cry,” he admits, Erza raising a brow to look at him. 

“You do?”

He nods, not looking at her. “Yeah, not the happy tears mind you. But the tears that fall when something pains you, and you’re too stubborn to let anyone else know what you’re thinking so you keep it all bottled up inside. You shouldn’t do that y’know, you’ve got friends here who would be willing to share the burden. You’re not alone anymore.”

Gray finally looks at her, their gazes meeting in the middle. She can’t help but smile softly at him, the smile only growing when the redness travels to his cheeks as well. “You’re not alone either. I’m not the only one guilty of bottling up my emotions.”

He scrunches his nose, “I’ve been getting better.”

“You have, and so have I.”

He nods, and a comfortable silence washes over them as they relish in the other’s company. It’s been a long while since it’s been just the two of them, and she’s grateful she’s had this chance to be with him. They never have to constantly talk for it to be comfortable between them. Silences like these are more than enough. 

“You know, I talked to Lucy this morning,” Gray starts, the redhead peeking over to look at him.

She doesn’t say anything, waiting for him to continue. “She mentioned something about meeting you in front of her apartment yesterday,” he elaborates, glancing at her.

Erza feels sheepish at the incident, the embarrassment at her inability to recognise where it was she had been walking washing over her again. “I did. It was interesting.”

“She told me that you told her about stuff and—“

“Look Gray,” she interrupts before he can go any further. She knows exactly what it is that he’s going to say, but that small inkling from earlier hadn’t left her mind since. It’s crazy but the longer she’s in his presence, the more she thinks that maybe it’s true after all. 

“I’ve been thinking and I just have to ask you,” she bites her lip, gazing directly into his eyes, “Is it— Is it—“

“Yes it’s you,” he blurts before she finishes, tearing his gaze abruptly away from her. He’s looking to the side, giving her a view of his red tinged cheeks and her heartbeat is hammering in her ears.

Ah, _there_ it is. So perhaps it hadn’t been so crazy after all. She bites her lip, a hand coming up to rest against her chest and she tries to think. Because even though she’d been trying to come up with an answer for over a week now, to finally have it and be the one she never expected at all is just—

That doesn’t even begin to cover what exactly her response should be now. Is it too early for her to agree? Is he expecting a response? But what if he does, what is she supposed to say? She hadn’t thought of anything yet. Actually it’s all still so surreal to her that she’s wondering if this is even real at all. But she feels that familiar thumping in her chest, the pumping of blood throughout her veins and arteries and she knows it’s not a dream after all. 

But still. Even after all that, what is she supposed to say? Or do? Or think? 

“..za. Erza,” she blinks, feeling a cold touch brush against her shoulder.

Erza looks up into the concerned gaze of the ice mage, and she berates herself for worrying him. “Yeah?”

“You spaced out for a bit there. You okay?”

She nods her head slowly, reaching up to rest a hand over the one resting on her shoulder. He’s watching her movements in slight confusion, so she squeezes his hand just a little in reassurance. “Yeah, I’m okay. Sorry about that, I didn’t mean to space out like that.”

Gray shakes his head. “Nah, it’s fine. But uh, about what I said earlier,” he pauses, using his free hand to scratch the back of his neck.

“It’s fine if you don’t give me an answer now. Lucy was telling me how you’d been out of it lately, and I noticed too but I didn’t think it’d be because of this. So I figured I’d tell you upfront so you don’t have to worry about it anymore. I’m not expecting anything, and I’m sorry for not telling you but I didn’t want to ruin the friendship we have,” he explains, his tone steady but she can feel the nerves rolling off him in waves.

She frowns a bit, leading to a bit of a misinterpretation as she sees him freeze momentarily, before trying to remove his hand from her shoulder. But she stubbornly keeps it there, staring at him in silence. 

“Look, Erza. You’re very important to me, alright? Like I said, I didn’t want to ruin the friendship we have, and I’m sorry about this.”

“Don’t.”

He pauses, brows scrunching together. “Don’t what?”

“Don’t be sorry about it.”

“But—“

Erza shakes her head, squeezing his hand lightly. “I understand you completely. I’m the one who should be sorry actually. I shouldn’t have pestered you about it, but I’m glad that I did.”

Gray blinks, tilting his head to the side. “You’re… glad?”

She nods firmly, “I’m glad.”

“About what exactly?”

Erza doesn’t reply immediately, instead flashing him a warm smile that catches him off guard. It’s sincere, and tender, and it’s full of the things she wants to tell him, but she can’t convey just yet. It’s quite new to her, and she still needs time to wrap her head around it. But like she’s heard time and time again, sometimes it’s better to trust your heart than your head. 

“I’m glad it’s me.”

From the way his jaw hangs open, ready to catch flies, she knows she’s said the right thing. It takes a while for him to formulate some semblance of speech after moments of his mouth opening and closing, but he gets there soon enough. “You—You _are_?”

She nods, and as if to tell him that she really does mean it, she shifts closer to him. He doesn’t move when she removes the hand on her shoulder, instead shifting his whole arm to wrap around her torso so she can rest her head against his shoulder comfortably. He stiffens for a moment, before finally relaxing against her, adjusting his arm to pull her closer. 

“I may not be at the stage you are yet, but I’m getting there soon. In any case, I’d still like to try, if it’s okay with you?”

Gray looks over at her as she lifts her head up slightly to meet his shocked gaze. “I’d be a complete idiot if I said it wasn’t. Yeah of course it’s okay Erza.”

She smiles at him, moving back to rest her head against his shoulder but not before pressing a chaste kiss against his cheek.

He freezes again, as still as the ice sculptures he creates, and she lets out a soft giggle. It’s when he relaxes against her that she lets herself be enshrouded by the warmth of her ice mage. “Good.”


End file.
